Go-To Tricks: When You Need a Confidence Boost!

This week I let go a bit.  I have felt so much pressure to step on that scale each week, which is not like me.  I remembered back to when I first lost 43 lbs on my own, with no support at all and I rarely stepped on the scale.  And that just feels right to me, because after doing it each week for 8 weeks, I see how much I really fluctuate and it gets me DOWN!  There was one measurement check where I literally lost 8 inches off my waist in 2 weeks!  Whoa…

So, this down and out feeling gets to my core sometimes.  I get so down on myself for not being more successful, for struggling.  And even though I know we ALL do struggle with things in our lives, the self-inflicted negativity does tend to undermine one’s self-confidence.

I got to thinking about some quick go-to activities that are confidence boosters.  Those little things that help give you a breather, a quick boost or help put things back into perspective, so life doesn’t wear you down.  Here’s my list:

Put on mascara – Sometimes, it’s just about not looking like you just woke up!

Write – A quick line, a quick idea, or my emotions at that moment. Whatever it is has the potential to take off and spawn another idea.  At the very least, it gives me a way to let something out and get it off my mind if need be so that I can focus without feeling stressed.

Workout – Exercise has become an important part of my life.  I now know that to feel my optimal best, I need to exercise in some form daily.  If not, I feel sluggish, tend toward depression and it’s a great release of “extra energy” that is constructive.

Eat healthy – Makes me feel good that I am on the right track toward my health goals and not treating my body like a trash can. (Thanks @miacupcake!)

Spend time with my kids – Just by getting on the floor and giving in to them wanting as much time as possible with me at this age.  I feel proud of them and proud of myself whenever we are together focusing on one another. 

Go to the spa – get a hair cut, massage or pedi – This is a larger scale of putting on mascara.  “You’ve worked hard (had a rough day/week) and you deserve a treat,” is usually the self-talk I hear.  And the relaxation time for myself does wonders.  If I can’t afford to go to a spa, I usually try to set up a standing appointment for at least a massage once a month.  Or I can make my own body scrubs and do something nice for myself.

For me, I've found that it's not about the physical self, it's the emotional self that needs recharged to get my confidence up there.  The clarity and perspective changers I get from those times of recharge, helps me think rationally instead of all of the negative self-talk that rolls around in my head at times.

What are your "go-to" tricks when you need a confidence boost?

I wrote this post in participation of Mamavation Mondays!

Who brings out the best in you? Overcoming negativity.

 

You KNOW what I am referring to.   There’s that ONE person (or maybe more) that just brings out the worst in you.  You know who they are.  And the very mention of their name or site of them gets you in a bunch or an overwhelming feeling of dread.  No?  It’s just me?  Try as I might, the outcome is always the same in my encounters with these people – disaster.  They might just be negative or argumentative, or even toxic.

I didn’t realize how much these types of relationships affected my life until I started questioning some of mine.  Looking back on photos and seeing in my face or eyes how miserable I looked and felt – not only emotionally, but also physically. 

Over time, you realize you just don’t bring out the best in each other.  Whether it’s a romantic relationship or a friendship, we need to lift each other up.  And if this is not the case, we may need to make the choice to move on (or AVOID these people) if change is not possible or out of our control.  We, after all, choose many of who we come into contact with.

On the other hand, there are those few shining stars in my life as well.  The people that simply emanate an aura of positivity towards me or just light up my life by walking into a room.   They just have the “cool factor” and I’m more open and upbeat, simply because I am around them.  These are the people that inspire me to dream, because they seem to believe in me in a way that is hard for me to do for myself.

I’m reminded of this each day by the picture below that I have on my computer desktop.  It’s important to continue this attitude, no matter if I’m drawing strength from surrounding myself with positive people or not.  I felt I was involved with something as equally exciting as Trick or Treating the day this photo was taken.  I love the light in our eyes, the glow from our faces and, of course, those two little cuties are the loves of my life, so how could one not be smiling?  But, behind the smile, it was real.  It was genuine. The focus and determination of doing something I love with people who are equally as driven and not bogged down by their fears, really shows and I had no idea.

Who/what inspires you?  How do you handle negativity in your life?

Traditional Food Recipe: Stuffed Carp

Well, if you haven’t seen my tweets all weekend long from oooooh’ing and ahhhhhh’ing over my much-needed weekend of R&R, here’s a post derived from my weekend with nature. I feel refreshed and my mind cleared, just as I suspected I would today! In fact, I’m writing this a whole day early!

The surprising view from my tent when I woke up Saturday morning. We set up in the dark and in the rain. It was foggy and visibility was poor, so this was a lovely surprise to have such a great view!

It just so happened to work out that I could arrange to be mostly off-call from work, and I had some kid-free "me time" that I could get away with a friend who invited me sort of impromptu.  It was exactly what I was needing, but I was not sure how to facilitate it for myself. So, I grabbed the chance to be out in nature and do some things I was interested in doing with someone who knew how.

Fast forward to late Saturday night. It had been a very nice day, but severe weather the night before. Almost every boat we pulled up to on the lake said the same thing, fishing wasn’t real great, the fish were all full. So, we tried again later in the evening, only to barely beat another severe storm to shore. 

It cleared pretty quickly after dark and after sitting by the camp fire for a few hours, the bells on the shore started going off. Here’s my very first fish that I officially reeled in myself! 

A nice sized Walleye.

Later we caught a carp, and it was about to be thrown back, but I was up to the challenge to find some way to prepare it. So, we kept it…sorry, little carp. Well, he wasn’t little since I got about 4 lbs of meat out of it. I had read I should salt and pepper the crap out of the carp (can't go wrong with that logic!), so I did after rinsing it, removing the fins and patting it dry. Then I scored it every square inch. I read that it would be easier when eating to remove the pin bones.

I’d never made anything list this before and I was excited to not only use fish we’d caught, but also my stash of morels that I myself had also hunted! I felt the same effect of when I let the kids help me cook, they eat so much better when they have that time investment in it. 

I was able to find a great recipe for Stuffed Carp. It was delicious! 

Sliced and served immediately after baking, with salt and pepper.

I would definitely be interested to know if any seasoned cooks have any tips for removal of the pin bones in advance. I had considered baking it whole next time and removing it all before using in a recipe for Carp Cakes (similar to crab cakes).

This post is part of:
Traditional Tuesdays: Nutritious & Delicious Blogging Carnival
hosted by Cooking Traditional Foods 

Wordless Wednesday

I know I tweeted this one out after finding it, but wanted to share again.  It was such a vibrant color to find on a log as we were mushroom hunting on a rainy, gloomy evening.  Can someone help me identify it?  Is it a natural cure for a disease? : )

It’s Tough Being a Woman Thursday

I have always been a writer.  I don’t know why my bio says “wanna-be.”  I produced a short story a week in middle school and poem after poem flew from my pen daily.  Before I graduated from high school, I had been published twice in English journals.  But, I never considered myself a writer.    

Recently, I’ve decided you are either a writer or you are not, the difference is your BIC (Butt In Chair).  That has always been a tough one for me as an adult and I’ve found it difficult to write like when I was a teenager.  But, let’s be honest, even as an active, busy teen, I still remember having time to shut the door to my room, turn on some music and just lay on my bed or floor, doodling, writing, or creating.  During that time in my life, I made time for it. 

We all need time for ourselves like this, especially us creative types.  I feel like I am drowning or suffocating if I am not creating, so for 10 years when I was busy becoming a wife, becoming a mother, becoming a career woman, and, in general, “in the thick of it,” I let it all go. 

I started this blog about a year ago, but didn’t really start posting to it until a couple of months ago.  In my current job, I am now in a full-time home office situation which, I thought, can only be a sign that I have the exact set up I always envisioned a “real” writer having.  Being able to freelance on the side from my home office.  [Erase clunky typewriter from the visual and insert my lime green lap top.]

I began writing what was going on in my life (ok, the “surface” stuff) like any blogger.  But, I quickly came to the conclusion that I was not going to be happy as a writer unless I wrote about the “real” stuff that my life is made of.  For example, posting about my overactive imagination during my first 5k race or telling anyone what I weighed.  My younger self would have been mortified that I would share this publicly, and while many of you may not personally know me, my blog is far from anonymous.  I really struggled with being from a small town and people finding out about what I write on here.  I know there are many who conceal their identity, but I am not mean, nasty or despicable.  I wouldn’t write publicly anything I would consider damaging.  While people may judge, that is beyond my control.  And hey, if they are following along just to be nosey, well then, at least they are tuning in each week for a good story, because I am FULL of THEM.  I do not lead a boring life – I LIVE.  

Esther: Queen of Persia

Now to the meat of this post and why I chose this title for Thursdays.  I became really inspired this past week when I attended my 2nd ever, in-depth real live bible study.  Now for those who know me AT ALL – don’t throw your neck out doing a double take.  I don’t consider myself an agnostic, atheist, heathen…whatever you’d like to call someone like me.  My aunts and uncles can attest from my earliest days, I am a very curious and questioning person.  (e.g. “Shut this kid up!”)  I don’t mind asking the tough questions.  But, growing up in a very conservative catholic family and town, it’s just “not something one does.”   How dare someone question the Lord or religion!  It makes others uncomfortable, however we all question things on the inside.  I don’t care who you are, you wouldn’t be human if you didn’t.

It’s not that I don’t “get it,” because I do.  So, please don’t misunderstand that I want to be “saved,” because you won’t be able to put it to me some way that someone hasn’t already.  I have been to EVERY church (except the church of Satan, I’ll be honest.)  I read the words, I see they’re significant, but then what?  I mean, really, then what happens?  More appropriately, I wonder, “Where do I fit in?” 

I’m not even all that sure I understand the personification of God.  I think more in terms of “What is God?” rather than “WHO is God?”  Yet, I also don’t understand how people can feel that God has abandoned them or left their lives.  When I step outside each morning and look at everything that is around me (especially when I am on my little road trips into the “real” part of the country life), I can’t understand why someone wouldn’t find that miraculous in and of itself, that there is a greater power at work.  Just so you don’t think I’m some questioning Pollyanna, I have been surrounded by some sort of mental anguish, depression, “black days,” many deaths and/or crises to some extent all my life and even I can see the beauty in the small things to understand nothing is a coincidence.  So, I now understand, I must go on a spiritual journey for myself and for my children.  

This is how I found myself sitting in a local Beth Moore study of “Esther: It’s Tough Being a Woman.”  I’m already so fascinated by the historical time setting and the Persian culture and we just left the first verse!  I’m fascinated to study the only book that has a stark absence of any mention of God.  And I’m fascinated (since I know nothing about how this story ends) about a woman leader (and a Jew), who in her time would have been up against quite a few odds.  From what I understand, the overall theme is having faith, though no “big” miracles are happening around you.  Listen for the subtleties. 

What Esther was believed to have looked like.

And, I was listening.  When my pen began to fly during the first study.  I was engrossed into the study itself, but somehow I possessed the ability to begin writing a page full of notes for writing ideas regarding this study and overall direction of my writing.  Something, I had been struggling with previously.  For the next 9 weeks as I process this study, I’d like to be write here.  I hope to gain a greater understanding of the wisdom others have found in these words, of the culture of the time and how I am supposed to be written into this story as I go along. 

Comment here or think about what you’ve struggled with as a woman.  Have you found yourself feeling powerless in situations that you felt were beyond your control? Do you have a mentor you consult on spiritual matters or do you find your journey to be as personal and individual as I do?

I don’t know what this all means for me, but I do feel as though I am being called to listen, to think (isn’t that why I was given such an active brain?) and write. 

Wordless Wednesday

My favorite photo of last year's county fair, the kids watching an old time puppet show.

 

 

How's the fair, O?

Just love this captured moment of my then, 6 year old looking at livestock

Slow-Roasted Pastured Organic Turkey

In the past, I’ve only prepared turkey during the usually suspected holidays.  Though, I love turkey.  

This year, I was fortunate enough to have the opportunity at receiving three turkeys from work.  So, it lent itself to some “kitchen science” and experimenting with different techniques!

I did the whole baking and roasting thing for Thanksgiving and it came out, well, “meh.”  It still seemed like a bit of a “tough bird,” not the succulent, juicy poultry I’ve enjoyed in the past with commercial varieties.  

We’ve had these turkeys for holidays for years.  I love that they are organic, free-range and fed a soy-free ration in addition to pasture, but I just knew I could improve on the way we’ve cooked them in the past.  I was determined to find a better way, because I felt so good that my family could reap the health benefits from such nutrient dense food.

As of today, my dad’s smoked turkey comes in a close second.  (Sorry, Dad.)

Here’s what I did:

I thawed the 11 lb turkey from the deepfreeze in my refrigerator for 4 days.  Yesterday, after removing dinner from a 400 F oven, I switched it to 250 F.  Then I placed the thawed bird into a large baking dish.  I poured a little virgin coconut oil into the cavity and over the top.  I then seasoned it with thyme, lemon and pepper, along with some freshly ground Himalayan salt.  No measurements, all to your taste.  I then covered it with foil (my lid wouldn’t fit, but if yours does, that would work well!) and slow-roasted it in the 250 F oven for about 5 hours.  After the first couple of hours, I flipped it over in the pan, added a little more coconut oil over the top of the other side and seasoned it as well.  Then 2 hours later, flipped it again.  After that last hour, it was ready.  So, I turned off the oven and let it in there until mid-morning when I had time to de-bone.  What I found inside, was a very tender, very juicy result.  I needed nothing but my hands to remove the meat from the bones!

This is going to be very economical, too.  I saved the neck bones and organ meats for making a simple soup  base later on – into the freezer they go!  I’ll have enough meat for several meals.  I haven’t quite planned them all out, but for sure a turkey noodle soup, tacos, nachos, turkey and noodles and perhaps even a turkey salad/spread.  I can chop some up to add to my lettuce and spinach salads, too!

I was so excited, I called my mom (of course, when Dad wasn’t home) to tell her THE NEW WAY.  Weird, but she already had one thawing!  So, I’ll be interested to hear how hers turns out.

Healthy. Economical. A traditional, real food idea.  And it was simple, too!

Please feel free to share your turkey disasters, kitchen science and comments with me below!

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